Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Randomize
