Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Randomize
