youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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