You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
