remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
