STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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