I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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