I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
