Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
