The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
