that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
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