She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize
