Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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