Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
