I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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