Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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