And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
