So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Houston, we have a blender
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
