Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize