i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
