She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Randomize
