Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
