so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
