Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
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