You're so nebulous sometimes
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
only if we run a train.
done.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
