So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
