Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
