ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
In the future we'll all be gay
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Randomize
