i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
