Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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