Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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