Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Randomize
