i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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