oh god the rape fog is back!
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
