i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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