She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
