I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
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