She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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