I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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