Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
