we have officially mastered the walk of shame
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
