If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
