She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
