have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Randomize
