you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
