I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Randomize
