i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
