i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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