I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
