this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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